Compartments

When I was young, I used to separate my food. I didn't want the peas to touch the mashed potatoes. I ate one little section at a time until I was finished with my meal. Nowadays, I could care less if it's all mushed up together, but I wonder if I started a pattern back then. It seems that in my life, I section off who I am and work with parts of myself one at a time.

For example, it seems that if I'm doing good in the Wife department, then I may be doing bad in the Mom department. Or perhaps the Housekeeper me is keeping everything clean (which could only be a miracle) but Teacher me is struggling. I swear it seems that if one section is succeeding then inevitably another is failing. Why can't I get all those balls in the air and juggle them at once?

My 21 Days are up on my screenplay deadline. I just cut eight pages. Ouch. I'm finished, sort of. Not sure if I ever truly FINISH a writing. It doesn't matter how many times I read it, I always change something. But maybe that's the process. Kind of like life.

Perhaps all those compartmentalized moments are like scenes in my life play. I have to be willing to let myself have the ups and the downs to get through any Act of my life. Deep down I know what I must do. Congratulate myself for the balls in the air and forgive myself for the rest.

Revisions, Revisions, Revisions

She sits at the computer humped over her many words, 127 pages of words to be exact. She burrows her brow in concentration as she attempts to revise more of her screenplay.

OPTIMISTIC ME
I love this scene!

CRITIC ME
This is idiodic!

OPTIMISTIC ME
But we need this scene, otherwise they won't know...

CRITIC ME
Cut it! It's ------!

OPTIMISTIC ME
Well, that one part is a little slow. I'll cut half the scene.

CRITIC ME
Whatever. It's never going anywhere anyway.

OPTIMISTIC ME
It doesn't matter if it goes anywhere; the point is that I'm doing it. It's been fun. Don't be so mean!

CRITIC ME
You call revising fun?

OPTIMISTIC ME
Well, it is work. But it's nice to be on this end of it.

CRITIC ME
Could we get back to work here, my shoulder is aching.

OPTIMISTIC ME
As soon as I finish this post.

CRITIC ME
You're writing a post about this?

OPTIMISTIC ME
Well, yes. It's all I can think of.

CRITIC ME
Lame.

OPTIMISTIC ME
When you have an idea, let me know.

Critic Me is finally silent.

Page 100

I am on page one hundred in my first attempt at a screenplay. For those who don't know, usually a screenplay is around 120 pages. Every page equates one minute of screentime, so 120 pages=120 minutes. I'm almost to my finish line. I feel like I have been eating, drinking and breathing this story. I'm a little obsessive about my stories sometimes.

Being that this is only the "random" draft, since I'm attempting to write straight through without stopping, I still have a long way to go until I am completely finished. I look forward to my revision stage. I love being able to rework it.

Just wanted to keep you posted (since it also holds me accountable).