Friday, October 06, 2006

Update

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It's been ever so long since I've blogged. I'm not sure why it's been so tough to sit down again. I haven't even been able to keep up with some of my favorite bloggers and for that I'm sorry. I will try to catch up!

I just wanted to update you all on my progress as of late. Not too long ago I shared my struggle with being a glutton. It's really more than that, it's an overall feeling that I deserve things to go my way. I feel God has been showing me so much about surrendering. Surrender to Him and His plans whether or not I understand them. It's difficult. I fight it so hard.

I felt led to fast for some days to seek Him and take the focus off myself or food. I cried before I started because I really didn't want to do it. I tell you this only to explain my journey. I pray it isn't for bragging rights. It broke me. Fasting has a way of doing that. You're suddenly not as strong as you thought you were. I felt weak and a shaky. It made me realize how 1/3 of the world feels daily. No wonder they struggle. It improved my compassion. If you'd like to read more about fasting, I love what Mark Buchanan says about it.

Throughout those struggling days I began to see how desperately I depended on God when He was my only strength and I didn't have chocolate to save me. I continue to learn about how to submit. It's so difficult. I wish there was a way to do it once and be forever done. I continue to walk baby step by baby step. On the upside, I am steadily loosing weight in very SMALL portions but at least the scale is going down. I am loosing inches too. Again, I'm not trying to brag but it's such a victory in my life that I have to give glory to God. I will say that it's improved my faith. Hopefully not just because things are going good but because I saw in a very miniscule way how through pain, I can learn to trust Him.

Well, I've rambled enough. I guess I'm making up for lost time. ;) Hope to read up on all of you soon!

4 comments:

Bttrfly1976 said...

I'm proud of you! You are doing such a great job. I'm not, but we won't go there! I just read that book by Mark. It was, as you suggested, a good read. I finished "Your God is Too Safe" and am now almost done with "The Holy Wild." He is good. I have missed your postings greatly, it is wonderful to hear about your world again, and that it is going well!

LiteratureLover said...

Wow! You're ahead of me. I haven't even started on The Holy Wild. I look forward to reading it though. You are always so sweet and encouraging. Sorry that I've been absent so long. :)

Bttrfly1976 said...

I forgive you....this time. No, I am kidding. My lack of a life does not infer that all others must have such mundaneness as well. The Holy Wild is great, I like it even better than the first. It's good stuff!

heartsjoy said...

Sis,
I am so glad that God is teaching you so much and that He is helping give that victory! Yippee!!