Garage Sale

We are holding a garage sale this weekend for any of you bargain hunters wanting to get a deal. We are doing it with/for some friends. Since I will probably not want to have another one for awhile, we have been in a frenzy to get as much of our stuff in it as possible. So I've been sorting through our house to get rid off anything I do not love. (Not to worry Mom, my special things are safely locked away in my hope chest and the china is staying.)

Then today we had an orthodonist appointment for both my girls. It was just the monthly check-up and they are both doing well. Since I was out already I decided to run by Bibliomania (a resale store for homeschool curriculum) to grab a book that I needed. That store is like the black hole for me because I find myself being sucked in wanting to buy more and more. I went in for one book and came out with two bags. Yes, I know, I DID say I was trying to get rid of stuff.

I guess these books can replace the ones that I'm getting rid of. Hee-hee. No seriously, they were books that I was needing for this year and most of them were off of the half-price racks. Great deals, see?

Then I needed to run to the Dollar Tree to get the price tag stickers for our stuff. To cut down on more temptation, I parked in front and sent my eldest daughter in alone with only enough cash to buy the stickers.

Tonight the girls and I are going to see The Lion King broadway production (someone gave us three free tickets!!). I cannot wait! Oh, and they're excited too. Little Mister is going to have some great one-on-one time with Daddy doing some boyish fun stuff.

Well, I better go. The house isn't getting any emptier while I sit here!

Mudman

Without snow, we must make do. My kids are loving the beautiful weather and making lots of things with mud. Needless to say, they've had lots of baths lately! I should probably just put a pool in the backyard and kill two birds with one stone. And in case you're wondering, yes, this IS school!

Jonah Syndrome

Tonight at Rivendell, we finished up the book of Jonah. I have really enjoyed this study for two reasons. One, it's entertaining. Two, I can relate to Jonah. I laugh at the end of Jonah when he FINALLY does what God tells him to do, then runs out and builds himself a booth from which to watch the destruction of Nineveh. He doesn't want them to repent. He's hoping that God will NOT change His mind but will follow through with the destruction. Instead, the people immediately repent. The king orders everyone to fast from food and water for three days hoping to pacify God. I can't imagine going three days without anything to drink!

God is merciful and doesn't destroy them. Jonah is on the sidelines watching and waiting. He longs for Nineveh to be destroyed and rightly so. He'd probably seen relatives brutally murdered or tortured by these people. He hated them and expected God to be on his side. But God didn't do what Jonah wanted. Instead, God brought to Jonah's attention that he cared more about the shade tree dying than he did about the people whom God could potentially destroy.

Jonah is so much like me. I listen for God to speak to me but then run when He asks something of me that I feel is unreasonable. What is He thinking?! I also have times of looking at others just as Jonah looked at the Ninevites and believe they deserve what's coming to them. But when I'm in the "hot seat", I beg and hope for mercy, just like Jonah in the belly of the great fish. (It always amazes me that it took him three days to repent. I think I would have been praying right away. But then again...)

I love the book of Jonah. He gets angry with God, just like me.

P.S. What is the deal with all the "3's"? He was in the belly of the fish for three days. The city of Nineveh was so large that it took three days to walk through it. The Ninevites fasted for three days. Of course Jesus was in the tomb for three days, so is there significance in the actual number three? I just thought of another one, the trinity.

Why Am I Thinking About School? It's Summer!

I tell you, I have been consumed with thinking about what I'm doing in school next year. Joyful Journey, you really got my thinker going! :) This is that time of year that I'm always re-evaluating what I've taught or not taught. I was having a moment of panic today and just poured my heart out to God. I decided to walk away from all my choices for a little while and calm down.

During the "calming down" time, I revisited my bookcases. I have so many good treasures there. I found one that I hadn't read. What's this? I sat down and began reading. A wave of relief rushed over me. I found exactly what I was looking for! (Unlike U2) Whew, Hubby will be glad that I'm not going to have spend more money. ;)

My Kids

I have really been missing my kids. I left town before they had even awakened last Thursday. They came up with Hubby two days later but I had been exposed to the "sickness" so we had to stay distant hoping they would not get it. We traveled apart - again trying to save them from getting ill. I didn't even tuck them in that Saturday night. We couldn't hug or anything. (Yes, I am a germ-a-phobe and if you saw how sick this Small Round Structured Virus makes a person, you would have had a phobia too!)

Late that night I got sick. So I was holed up in my room for two days. They were not allowed to even enter the room. Hubby was an excellent nurse and took very great care of me. Finally on Tuesday I felt strong enough to get up. But since this particular virus can still be contagious up to three days after the last symptom, we weren't taking chances. I kept them at a distance but it was SO HARD!!! I wanted to just hug the guts out of them and smother them with kisses. Today, being Wednesday, I'm still not giving kisses but I have given hugs. I'm missing them so much that I've just got to tell some stories.

Little Mister stood at my door the other night with the saddest (and cutest) expression. He said sorrowfully, "Mommy, I wish you could tuck us in. I just want you to give me kisses." Whaaaa!!! Me too, baby.

My little lady has been a little comedian. She kept me entertained from the door of my room by doing hilarious dances and routines. She also has an incredible voice. My eldest daughter and I have very similar voices, very low and raspy. But Little Lady is quite different. The girl has been able to sing very high notes and on pitch since she was tiny! She has a erethral voice that sounds similar to Charlotte Church. Last night she actually decided to do a concert for me. It was beautiful. It was hard to believe that such a powerful voice was coming out of an eight year old. She usually gets too embarrassed when I'm looking right at her. But for some reason, last night she just belted it out and kept singing. I was mesmerized. It was incredible. I think I should get her in voice lessons - or maybe not. She's doing pretty good on her own.

Little Miss has been an amazing help throughout all this! She has stepped up into the mothering role and helped assist her Daddy in taking care of the younger siblings. By Tuesday it was beginning to wear on her, so I took over from there. Yesterday she asked me to read my blog about Papaw aloud to her. I did it without crying. Then she asked if I could read the comments. I started to, but by the middle one tears started dripping. I told her I was sorry. She patted me and sweetly said, "That's okay Mom. It's alright if you cry." Precious girl. I'm glad she already knows it's okay to cry.

Now you can understand why I'm missing them. Tomorrow I'm kissing those sweet little cheeks, virus or no virus!

The World Minus One Great Man

My Grandpa died early Thursday morning. I was about 20 minutes away from the hospital when I got the call that he was gone. I cried good and hard those last twenty minutes. I've cried off and on ever since.

I couldn't tell you everything He meant to me because I wouldn't have room on the page no matter how long it was. But I can tell you a few things. First and foremost, my life will never be the same. As my Grandmother so perfectly put it, "It won't be any fun around here." Papaw could tell stories. He could have us all laughing so hard we couldn't breathe. He told a few stories that ended with scaring the fire out of you at the end and then you'd be breathless again with laughter. No wonder I love stories so much.

My favorite Papaw sayings were: "Well, law me!" and when I'd tell him I loved him he'd wink and say, "Well, I kinda like you, too!" wrapping his arms around me in a great big hug. Papaw was always handsome. He seemed to grow more attractive with age.

He was a pillar to me. I could never imagine life without him. I still can't. He'd tell my sister and me that he wanted us to sing at his funeral someday, and I'd tell him to stop talking morbid because I didn't want to think about it. We did sing at his funeral, today.

My Memaw and Papaw were married 67 years. That's longer than I've been alive. They loved each other dearly and have been an amazing example of what a marriage should be.

I've lost my Grandfather, my Godly example, my encourager, my teacher but most of all, my friend. When C.S. Lewis' wife died, a friend told him, "Life must go on." To which C.S. Lewis replied, "I don't know that it must, but it does." I know what he means.

Walking

My oldest daughter and I have been walking these last few weeks. It's been a good early-morning connection. We've had so much fun and I can tell she loves having me all to herself. I'm a captive audience. It's been good for me as well because I'm usually too tired at night to talk for long. So, on our strolls, I can catch up on her private world. One morning we even found a $10 bill. Talk about benefits of walking! ;)

Sorry, I'm not having much time to post lately. Hopefully I can catch up sometime soon.

N-N-N-NO!

This morning about mid-morning I started feeling really dizzy. I ate something to try to relieve it thinking that I hadn't eaten breakfast yet. Finally I decided to lay down until it went away. Little Lady came into my room and asked what was wrong. I told her it was nothing but a little dizzy spell.

"Dizzy spell? A dizzy spell?!! Yippee!!!! You're going to have a baby!!!!!" she squealed. Then she ran through the house cheering with glee and telling her other two siblings that I was going to have a baby.

"N-N-N-NO! Honey, I'm NOT going to have a baby. Sweetie, get back in here!" I shouted. Finally she made her way back still jumping for joy. I couldn't help laughing at her enthusiasm. I had to inform Little Miss and Little Mister that their sister was, in fact, mistaken.

When I finally got Little Lady to calm down I asked her what made her think that I was pregnant just because I had a dizzy spell.

"That's what happened to Ma on Little House on the Prairie. She was having dizzy spells and then she was pregnant!" She exclaimed.

That's it. No more watching Little House on the Prairie!

Confused

Last night our elderly neighbor lady came to our door wondering about her girls. She doesn't have any girls so I tried to clarify with her who she was talking about. She said it was her neice and nephew that she was watching. I asked her a few more questions and could tell she was confused. She talked to my kids sweetly as she always does and then told me if I saw the girls to have them come home.

Having a step-father-in-law with Alzheimers, I was worried about her so I watched her walk back to her house and go inside. I began to wonder if her husband was at home and since I didn't want her wandering off I went over to check.

Her husband answered the door. I told him what had happened and that I wanted to be sure everything was okay. He didn't even realize she'd left the house. Then he told me that she was confused. They had recieved pictures of their granddaughters that day and for some reason she had it in her head that they were actually there. He asked me to come inside and talk with her awhile and reassure her that there were no extra children at my house. So I came in and visited.

I hate that I had no clue that she was going through this. I'm not sure how long they've known she was ill. Having watched my Mother-in-Law tend her husband, I know that the caretaker gets very little rest. It's tiring to have someone constantly asking the same questions over and over. Plus the person with Alzheimers usually doesn't sleep well. Because of that it can be truly difficult for the caretaker to sleep restfully because they are worried their loved one will wander off. It's also difficult when the Alzheimer's patient gets something in their head that is not true but they believe it to be true. They are not easily convinced of the real truth. I am sorry for this sweet couple. They are precious people and I had wondered why I hadn't seen them out lately. I wish I would've checked on them earlier.

I'm hoping to be able to "sit" with her so he can have some time to himself. Or maybe just visit so he can talk with someone else. Pray for them. Pray for me to know how to minister to them.

The journey is the destination

The other night, Hubby brought home a movie for me to watch about the children in Uganda. To keep from being abducted and forced into the rebel army, thousands of children leave their villages every evening to walk to the city and sleep because there is more protection for them there. Thousands of children are crammed together on the floor of something like a garage parking lot without an adult in sight. Yet, these amazing children do their homework by candlelight and then fall asleep. They get up before dawn to start their journey back to the villages. They laugh. They dance and sing praising God because they made it another night without being captured.

I'll be honest, the night after I watched this movie I couldn't sleep very well. Here I worry about not having enough money to give my daughter an American Girl Birthday party or that two of my children actually have to share a room. I felt ashamed. It's continued to haunt me. I wish I could take those children and bring them into my house to be safe and have soft carpet to sleep on. It has definitely put things into perspective for me.

Please check out the Invisible Children website. I also recommend another great book on this subject is The Journey Is the Destination. It's the journal of a young photojournalist, Dan Eldon, who also wanted to bring the world's attention to the problems in Africa. He was killed while doing it and his mother published his journal.

Woman Reading

I have this exact picture hanging in my home. It was going to be thrown away by someone else when I salvaged it. One look at it and I was drawn in. I have enjoyed many moments of reading a book only to look up at the pretty woman in the picture doing the same thing. She stands for everything I want to be. She's a reader. She is elegant and beautiful. She's engrossed in the story. Needless to say when I found one that I could post online, I HAD to show it. Enjoy!

Passion

I have stated before how stories drive me. I have tried to understand why. The one common thing all stories have that impact me, is passion. I don't necessarily mean the love kind of passion.

Tonight I found myself again watching one of my favorite movies, Peter Pan. It's not the Disney version but the live action version. (If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend it. Although, due to some violent fighting, I don't let my younger children see it.) There is a scene where Peter Pan has been abandoned by all his friends except Tinkerbell. She saves his life and gives up her own. She dies in front of him and he is so broken. He lays her down, kneels beside her grabbing the dirt in agony, and then shouts, "Tiiiiiiiinnnnnnkk!!!". It is so moving. I know it's a fairytale but the pain is universal. His passion is what pulls at my heart strings.

Then there is another movie called, The Story of Us. It's about a marital struggle between a husband and wife. At the end, when you believe the relationship is lost there is a powerful scene where the wife turns to him and pours out her heart. She says that even if she wanted to start over she could never tell the "next guy" that their son looks like him. Or she could never say, "Remember when Julie threw up on the Washington monument?" She goes on referring to memories throughout their relationship. She ends it by telling him she doesn't want a divorce because she loves him. She says that while their marriage isn't perfect she can't imagine having anyone else with her but him. You hold your breath because his expression seems callous. But then he reaches for her and as they embrace he tells her that he loves her too and doesn't want to give up on "us". They both cry and I bawl like a baby EVERY time I see it. (I know, no surprise.)

Of course, I don't just like sad moments, I love any moment that a passionate heart finally connects with another human being. I LOVE the moment when Miss Daisy finally breaks down and tells her chauffeur that he is her very best friend. Or when Rocky triumphs over an unbeatable foe. Or when the knight in A Knight's Tale wins the tournament in the hearing of his blind father. THOSE are incredible moments.

Maybe it's because passionate moments are all around me. Like when my husband proposed and completely took me by surprise (it was HIS birthday, after all). I was so overcome with happiness that I, well you know, cried. Then I told him yes.

Or when my second daughter was born and they could not get her breathing. She was whisked out of the room with "Code Blue" being shouted over the intercom while my husband and I held each others hands in silence; I couldn't breath. That moment the door shut without hearing one cry from my baby girl covered me in fear. Then a few seconds (what seemed like hours) later when I heard her scream loud and clear down the hallway, suddenly I could breath and sob at the same time.

Or the moment when my husband said he felt led to start a church. It would mean great uncertainty for us but I felt like the girl in Titanic, "You jump, I jump."

The moment we found out his father had a brain tumor. They said it was cancerous and that he only had one year to live. He died one year later.

The moment I realized that my tiny baby girl had blossomed into a beautiful Little Miss and it was time to have THE talk.

The moment my Little Lady asked me how to believe in a God she couldn't see.

The moment when Little Mister made a picture of a girl. I commented on how pretty she was. He said, "I like them pretty. Like you, Mom!" And I melted into a puddle on the floor.

How can you not love story? Life would be boring without passion, don't you think?

Big

I had a realization last night that my little mister is really getting big. Why am I just now noticing it? Because he doesn't just let me kiss him whenever I want to anymore. Now he starts to squirm away when I'm being too affectionate. And it dawned on me last night that my time with that "little" one is moving on. Now I don't have any more babies and I'm moving into the later stages of life.

Maybe I'm just feeling emotional because my doctor told me last week at my thyroid checkup that I may be pre-menopausal. What?! ME? I'm too young. Plus he added that I'd gained a good amount of weight in just ONE year. I love it when the doctor is full of good news. :{

But back to what I was saying, there was a storm last night blowing through our town complete with Tornado watch. My little mister suddenly became "little" again. He wanted me to hold him and snuggle him. I cherished every moment and covered his cheeks in kisses until he asked me to stop.

Warning for those of you with babies: In the near future, I may need to hold your little one and give 'em a few kisses.

Tagged!

Heartsjoy tagged me to tell six random things about myself. So, here goes...

1. I wanted a red-headed child but they're all blond as sunlight. (Well, at least my husband is still red-headed.)

2. I'm a germ-a-phobe. I don't care if I know you and love you, I'm still NOT going to drink after you (unless I'm dying of thirst since dying of germs would be irrelevant at that point).

3. My mom and my sister, being true extroverts, taught me how to greet people and small-talk with the best of them. But deep at heart, I'm an introvert.

4. A pet peeve of mine is when someone is pretending to listen while they glance about the room. LOOK AT ME WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU!!!

5. I get estatic about graph paper. I LOVE to graph stuff like rooms of the house and change the furniture around on paper.

6. I still bite my nails even though I'm trying to stop.

Okay, now I'm going to tag anyone reading this blog that would like to play this game. You're it!

If - Then and Blessing Charts

These are my two charts (found them at Doorposts). One is the If-Then chart, which shows IF my children choose wrongly THEN this will happen. The other one is a Blessing Chart. When they exemplify good character throughout the week or if I've seen a marked improvement on something that previously was a struggle, they will recieve a reward on Sunday.

Early Mornings

I haven't written anything serious for awhile because I haven't wanted to. I've had a bit of a rebellious heart. God has been showing me how I've been "eating the bread of idleness". I love to sleep, and I would much rather plan things than actually do the work. I'm lazy. I admit it. And it's wrong. So my conviction grew until I finally repented.

"Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where He prayed." Mark 1:35 Jesus did that?! Hmmm.

"At daybreak Jesus went out to a solitary place." Luke 4:42 I love that word, solitary. For me, it translates, "alone" and I love to be alone.

"She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls." Proverbs 31:14 My servant girls are my dishwasher, coffee maker, crockpot, oven, washer and dryer.

"In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation." Psalm 5:3

This is from the Message translation because I love how it's worded:
"First thing in the morning, she dresses for work, rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started." Proverbs 31:17 Eager? Well, God's working on me.

Starting this last Monday, I've been getting up at 5:00a.m. Shocking, I know. But as much as I hate to admit it, this night owl is beginning to enjoy her mornings. It's been such a jumpstart beginning my day with an hour to read, study and pray uninterrupted. Then I'm wide awake and able to get completely ready from head to shoe (she dresses for work). I begin my morning "workout" by swishing and swiping the bathroom before I leave it. I rush to the kitchen and get my "servant girls" started. I set the timer and hurry to tidy up all the hot spots that seem to collect clutter. I run through the front rooms (kids are still sleeping so I don't want to go into their rooms yet) throwing away any trash and collecting things that belong in another room for the kids to put away. My blood is pumping now and I grab a load of laundry to fold or put into the washer. I hurry to put clothes away. I start breakfast and begin working on dinner. By now it's time to get the kids up so I wake them and set the timer for 30 minutes while they do their morning chores. I rush back to the kitchen to set the table then check on dinner and laundry. I review my calendar to see what is ahead for the day and prepare anything needed for school. By the time my kids come to the table I am ready for another cup of coffee and I rejoice that my morning "workout" is done.

It's nothing short of a miracle for this sleepyhead!

The Church

This video really struck me as what the church should be. I love you, all my friends and blogging friends. This is dedicated to you.

Pink

Okay, I believe that I have officially trumped Heartsjoy and Supermom on the hair fiasco. I have a new way of dying my hair. Instead of using regular dye, why not try Easter egg dye? Yes, you read it right.

I was letting my children dye Easter eggs and they were very careful not to let any of it spill. We had foil underneath everything. Well, wouldn't you know it? As I was cleaning up, I spilled the hot pink color. It was on the table (yes, it stained but fortunately it was not my "good" table), on the floor (got most of it up) and all over my hands. Well, I must have unknowingly run my fingers through the back of my hair in a moment of frustration because at dinnertime Little Lady asked me why my hair was pink. "What?" I asked, thinking that surely she was joking. Nope! All my children agreed that I had pink streak running through the back of my hair. You know, it couldn't be in the front where it would look like I was trying to be cool. It's in the back in a very obsure place. I frantically tried washing it out but it did not come out. So now I'm sporting around a sort-of pink "do". Well, it's fitting for springtime, don't you think?

Prayer Time

Early this morning, I was able to be part of a prayer vigil Rivendell was having throughout the night. My hour was from 1:00 - 2:00a.m. I was really excited about it. It's not often that I get an entire hour with the Lord uninterrupted. The prayer room was set up with about five or six different stations. It was all extremely moving. This morning I feel refreshed, refocused and a bit mournful imagining how the disciples must have felt. I'm glad that Sunday is coming for celebration but right now my heart is quiet and thoughtful.

Crybaby

Does it come with age? I have become the biggest crybaby! I swear, a commercial comes on with a little sentimental flavor and tears start dripping off my face. I find myself trying to hide it because my kids have caught on. "Mom, are you crying over that?!" "Yes, I am," I say sniffling.

If I'm watching a movie or reading a book, I cry at the tender moments, the sad moments, the climatic happy moments, the kissing moments and the restoring moments. It's so ridiculous! I've even been known to start crying while someone is telling me a story, right there in front of them! How embarrassing. Maybe it's just that I've hit middle age and I'm feeling everything deeper. At least, I hope that's it.

I think I need a Kleenex, sniffle.