My Friend, My Foe

There are sins in my life that I have struggled with for years. They feel like friends because they are so familiar. But they are not friends. I see more and more the destruction they bring whenever I turn to them instead of the Father.

It reminds me of a story in the Bible in the book of Hosea where God tells Hosea to marry a prostitute. Hosea obeys and marries Gomer. God uses their marriage as a way of showing His people Isreal what He feels about them. That He loves them in spite of their betrayal (adultery). Gomer has some children but then eventually leaves Hosea to pursue her prostitution again. God tells Hosea to go after her. What woman isn't swooned by a man courageously coming after her? Hosea finds her and buys her back which means she had probably fallen into slavery. Sin always leads to slavery in some form. Hosea brings her home and restores the relationship. He LOVES her in spite of her sins against him. The compassion and forgiveness in this story is immense.

I am Gomer. There are times I feel sure that God has given up on me. He must! After all, how much forgiveness can someone give?! As my Little Lady put it one time, "Don't we only have to forgive 7 times?" She was a little mixed up on the scripture about that and wasn't wanting to forgive her brother. But I can relate to her. Sometimes I don't want to forgive. And yet, HE does. Why?

I was listening to a song from Selah called Mystery. Here is an excerpt of it: "The king was born on Christmas day/Born to save the world/But long before the world began/He knew this day was sure/His pain and strife secure/Mystery/How He came to be man/But greater still/How His death was in His plan/God predestined that His Son would die/Yet He still created man/Oh, what love is this?/That His death was in His hands/ I am just a man that can't begin to comprehend/When you look into these traitors eyes/ Do you see that justifies the plan?"

I don't see how I justify His plan. I love the scripture in Hosea 3:1 when God is speaking to Hosea: "Then the Lord said to me, 'Go and get your wife again. Bring her back to you and love her, even though she loves adultery. For the Lord still loves Israel even though the people have turned to other gods, offering them choice gifts.'" Isn't that beautiful? He loves in spite of betrayal.

I do not understand it. I probably never will.